


Answer

by Galadraen



Series: Where Soul Meets Body [2]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Asexuality Spectrum, First Kiss, M/M, Mentioned Iron Bull/Dorian, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-24
Updated: 2014-12-24
Packaged: 2018-03-03 05:11:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2839253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galadraen/pseuds/Galadraen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cole is confused about his feelings for the Inquisitor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Answer

**Author's Note:**

> a/n: aro/ace writer respectfully depicting cole’s crush on the inquisitor and the beginnings of a platonic relationship

Orlais was her city, Sera had said, and was off without a word, dashing down the nearest alleyway. Cassandra had business in the court to attend. They were alone then, just the two of them. The Inquisitor had suggested going to a café to try his first food. Uncertainty filled his mind, but he enjoyed being with the Inquisitor. He would try it.

The Inquisitor called it ice cream; a fairly new confection of the mage’s invention. The idea of eating did not appeal to him, but the Inquisitor had seemed excited. The sun was in his smile when he returned holding two little cones. He was glowing and Cole wanted to smile back. Skittish fingers reached out to take the treat from his offering hands.

_Pink like a sunset. Little red flecks scattered throughout the sky._ Those must be what the Inquisitor had called strawberries. It reminded him of bloodstone. Maybe The Iron Bull would like it too...

“It’s pretty.” He watched it drip over and onto his hands, pink rivulets rolling over his fingers, cold and sticky, contrasting with the heat of the sun on his skin.

His heart jumped, startling him, when the Inquisitor laughed and told him, his voice kind and encouraging, “You have to eat it. It melts! It tastes even better. Take it slow though, okay?”

“Oh…”

Swallowing his apprehension, and without another thought he took a bite of it as he had seen others do with their meals in the tavern in Skyhold.

_Too intense. Sticky, honey sweet. Too cold. Freezing fingers in the snow. Chattering teeth. Icy daggers, stabbing._

Squinting in pain, he reached up to touch his head, “It hurts. I don’t think I like it…”

The Inquisitor laughed in earnest this time, a deep rumble in his chest and patted Cole on the back. His heart did a flip in his chest at the sudden touch. “You don’t bite it!”

He watched as the Inquisitor licked the cone, just enough to get the taste and not feel the biting cold. He imitated the gesture and was surprised by the flavour. Sweet again, almost too sweet on his tongue, but pleasant.

They sat there in silence, eating their ice creams, Cole savouring each morsel, eating more slowly than his companion, the treat melting in his hands. He didn’t mind. He tried not to listen to the Inquisitor’s thoughts though, but it was difficult. He’d learned sometimes when he wasn’t trying to help it could be rude and he heard things he didn’t understand. But what he did hear was like tinkling crystal. Happy.

Now that Corypheus had been defeated the Inquisitor’s soul was heavy with grief too often. He had tried to help, but the pain was buried deep, hidden away inside, locked away tight where even he couldn’t reach. Now that he was more human, it was even more difficult to help and lately he had been focusing more and more on helping him… It was nice to see him smile again.

Cole was content to sit at the Inquisitor’s side, listening to the city and watching the people pass by in their splendid outfits, bright like how he remembered the Fade. The people were unfriendly and strange, but the sights and sounds lovely.

“Wait here.” The Inquisitor said, breaking their silence, before rising and shortly returning with a damp cloth, taking Cole’s hands in his. “You made a right mess of yourself.”

A fire immediately bloomed in his chest, the warmth spreading to every corner of his body, his pale cheeks flushed. No one had willingly touched him often. Pats on the back from Varric and The Iron Bull. Dorian straightening his clothing. And something Sera called “noogies”. The Inquisitor’s hands were large, rough and calloused from hours of training, but his touch was gentle as he wiped the mess from his fingers.

_Butterflies in his stomach. Swirling, fluttering, and roiling like water against rocks. But warm. Like the sun in his chest, rising. Was it the food or the Inquisitor? He was close. He wanted him closer. But then he’d know. He couldn’t know. It would hurt too much for him to pull away after being so close…_

Worry worked its way into the Inquisitor’s expression and he averted his eyes. “Maybe you shouldn’t have so much. It’s your first food after all. Not sure how this body will react to it. Don’t want you getting sick. Are you feeling okay? You look red…Damn, what if you can’t handle the milk? Oh Maker, what if you’re allergic to strawberries?!” he rambled, his voice growing slowly more frantic.

Weeks ago, Solas had asked him if he had developed any interest in women since he had become more human and Cole had not lied. The Inquisitor after all, was not a woman.

He had left him gifts. Lilacs, a scent that reminded him of his mother’s tender embrace and reading with her by the fireplace. Lemon cakes, to remind him of his sister. They were her favourite. Hot coffee in the morning, since he always seemed to end up in the kitchens before his councils with his advisors if Cole didn’t leave it for him. He wondered if he knew who left it there each morning…

An idea occurred to him then. He had seen Dorian do it to The Iron Bull when he thought no one was looking. A small peck on the lips, the cheek. Cole wasn’t sure what it meant except that you liked someone. And that you both were supposed to enjoy it. They both always smiled afterwards at least. He wasn’t sure what it would make him feel. How long were you supposed to do it? Dorian had always been brief, but he had seen The Iron Bull scoop him up in his arms and kiss him for a long time. There had always been lots of kissing in that book Cassandra read him too…

If it meant you liked someone, liked them a lot, he wanted the Inquisitor to know too.

Leaning in close, he tenderly pressed his lips against his, cutting off the Inquisitor’s worrying rambles.

_Mouth sticky and soft. The taste of strawberries. “It’s my favourite.” He had said. The scratch of his beard against his cheeks. It tickles. His laugh echoing in his head, tinkling bells._

It was the Inquisitor who broke the kiss. Suddenly it occurred to him what he had just done and he pulled his hands away, hiding his face behind his hair and hat, ashamed.

_Now he knows. Now he knows and he pulled away. He’ll pull away more. He’ll forget. He’ll forget, but I won’t and I’ll remember the taste of strawberries and he won’t._

Reaching up to gently touch Cole’s cheek, the Inquisitor lifted his face to meet his gaze.

“Oh my sweet friend. You don’t know what you give me.”

“A kiss…” He was confused. Of course he knew. “It means I like you.”

He smiled softly. “And I like you too, Cole. But there are many kinds of love. And people love in many different ways. Some even I don’t understand. I want you to understand what one you feel. You’re still new to being human. You have much to learn yet…”

_Work. Wood splintering against his fingertips. The pain is a distraction. Numbing. There must be more papers to sign, to look over. Hot lips against skin. Sailing. Sinking. Sinking. Submerged. Don’t think of him…_

“I’m hurting you again, aren’t I? Making you remember.”

“No Cole, you’re not. Not all pain is bad. I don’t want to forget him.”

“What was his name?” he asked, his voice quiet.

“Jonathan.” Pain filled the Inquisitor’s eyes. “He was a soldier in my father’s army. He was at the Conclave with me when everything happened. I loved him very much. I still do. He’d want me to be happy though, but I like to remember him…to keep him close.”

“I’m sorry that he died…”

“So am I.”

“I want to help…”

“You do help.” It was weak, just a twinge, but the smile was there again and Cole’s chest felt tight. “Just promise me something, Cole. Choose someone who respects you. Who won’t hurt you. Who cares for you and will stop when you say no. Someone who is patient and kind and will guide you. Someone who won’t press when you step back and won’t shy away when you reach for them. Just please, whoever you choose, be sure.”

Reaching out, he took the Inquisitor’s hand in his, threading their fingers together, feeling the warmth radiate through those rough, calloused hands.

“I am.”


End file.
